You Need a Spotter: Life Lessons from the Gym and Office

August 2024, I decided to start working out in the gym. I had started a new role, in a new company, in a new city and the H.M.O. covered gym visits to a gym not too far from where I lived so it made sense. I mean who doesn’t like free things but I digress…

When I first started working out, I had a fear of going to the gym when there were a lot of people around. I didn’t want to look silly lifting light weights or using bad form. I thought it was better to exercise alone, where no one could see my mistakes. But over time, I realized that having people around is actually one of the best parts of working out. There are experienced lifters who can help correct my form, people who can spot me on heavier lifts, and an overall environment that pushes me to do better.

Backtrack to June 2024. I had just started a new role, in a new company, in a new city, and I needed to make a good first impression (or first impressions because it was quite the probation period).

I was hesitant to speak up in meetings. I wanted to be careful with my contributions, worried that I might say something incorrect or ask a question that made me look inexperienced. But just like in the gym, I found that my teammates were more than willing to help. They wanted to see me succeed, just as gym bros want to see each other improve. The more I engaged, the more I learned, and the better I became at my job.

Over the past couple of months, I’ve found that there are a number of similarities between the gym and the office and I want to share these insights with you.

The summary is, “You need a Spotter”

A Spotter to Tell You “This is Too Light for You”.

It was one of those Saturday mornings at the gym. I had just finished a number of programs upstairs. I had done some sets of dumbell curls, dumbell shoulder presses, etc., and my hands were FINISHED (or so I thought).

I went downstairs to do a few sets of the declined chest press and call it a day but then I ran into him. We had seen ourselves in the gym a number of times and given each other the nod now and again but we weren’t “guys” like that. For one, he had his crew that he always worked out with and I am not the “make-a-new-friend” type of guy.

He and his workout partner had just done their set and were leaving the machine. She (his workout buddy) had finished last and her weights were still on the machine. As I approached to take my seat and start my set, “This is too light for you na”, he said. “Shebi you saw me upstairs and all the work I was doing? Abeg my hands are finished.”, I replied with a chuckle. I mean my hands really felt like they were finished and the weight load his partner had left was just about right for me as at the last time I checked so yh, I was doing my best.

I did one set at that weight load and decided, “You know what, let’s see if he’s right.” He had said it with such a convinced tone that I just had to try this thing he said. I loaded a few more plates (or maybe one more) and behold, I had a new minimum. He was right. That was too light for me.

“Triumph, take one or two of your colleagues, go to [redacted]’s office, sit with their team, and hear what they have to say so you can facilitate implementation on the [redacted] project in such a way that meets their specific needs.”, she said. “I literally just got here yesterday. Can I just sit in the office and do the comfortable things?”, I thought. I knew this was part of what I signed up for. Infact, to me, it was an exciting part of the role, sitting with clients, listening to their pain points, and building solutions for them that make an immediate impact. It was exciting but I thought I needed more time. Nope. I was ready I just didn’t know it yet.

When I went to the client’s office with my teammate and had the session, it was clear to me that getting the call to go visit this client and my teammate's support and confidence in our abilities as a united front were the catalysts I needed to unlock this hidden potential.

Often times, we underestimate our strengths and choose weights and tasks that are too easy. A spotter can call you out, telling you it’s time to push yourself harder.

Just like in the gym, growth comes outside your comfort zone and you need a spotter to tell you when you’ve been in that weight class for too long.

You need that spotter.

A Spotter to Scream “One More!”

Walk past any bench press or squat stations at the gym in peak hours and you’re sure to hear “ONE MORE!, “UP!”, “PUSH!” or any other version of these motivational exclamations.

A good spotter would ask you how many reps you’re going for before you start the set. “10 reps” you might say and then you get in position.

9 reps later you’re about to give up but this is a mental battle, not a physical one. You need someone to scream “one more” and somehow you get the extra mental strength to fulfill your promise to yourself that you would do 10 reps and somehow you do.

— — — — — — — — — —

“What if they ask questions about this project? Please be around to respond.”, I texted my manager. I had promised to deliver a presentation during a firm-wide townhall on a project we had worked on and I had suddenly started developing cold feet. I wasn’t going to back down (at least I want to think so) but I needed to find a way to get myself out of the spotlight as quickly as possible.

His response, though not the most preferred at the moment, in retrospect, was the best response I could receive. “You’re capable.”

He didn’t say more. I do not remember exactly how I replied but I know I didn’t reply with “Thank you that’s what I wanted to hear.” I was terrified to bits! It was most likely something along the lines of “Oh [redacted], please oh… “. He on the other hand didn’t reply again.

Showtime! I had to deliver this presentation. Somehow, I did and the feedback was positive. I knew in the back of my mind that my manager would jump in if and when necessary but I didn’t need to have that knowledge at the fore when getting into the presentation. If I did, maybe I would have given up.

Just when you’re about to give up, a good spotter pushes you to fulfill make good on your promises and that’s how you grow.

You need that spotter.

A Spotter to Guide Your Approach

“Five is a number.” — Probably the best thing I’ve ever heard in the gym so far.

Let me explain. Most sets are counted in reps of 10 and so when I don’t think I’m able to hit 10 reps in a weight class, I find myself not attempting at all. On this faithful day, I found myself in a bench press rotation with one of the “henchest” guys in the gym. I did my humble set and stepped aside for the senior man to do his. When the rotation was complete and everyone had done their set, it was my turn again (As they say, “No matter how much you hide, your turn will come” 😆 ).

I calmly approached to repeat my humble set and he goes, “Do [redacted] na”. He wanted me to go A WHOLE 10KG higher. “Guy abeg, make I no kill myself here oh”, I said playfully. He responded with equal parts laughter and seriousness. “Do it guy… Okay, just try, five is a number.”

“I dey for you, no fear”, he concluded as he signaled others to add the extra plates and took the spotter’s position.

I mean if one of the most physically built guys I’ve seen around here is going to spot me on this set, what do I have to fear?

To my greatest surprise, I did 5 reps of this new weight class. Of course, he granted some assistance but the fact that I pushed it at all was all the motivation I needed. I had found my new minimum and I did a few more sets on this weight class.

Two things:

1.) The big picture is often a daunting one but when the task is broken down into smaller digestible bits and approached in this manner, it’s most times the case that we deliver exceptional results that we wouldn’t have been able to have we spent too much time looking at the big picture. Managers who are able to break down the “ask” to simpler tasks are the best spotters you can have.

2.) My role is a client-facing role and while I enjoy talking to people about their challenges and coming up with solutions for them, it can be really intimidating to get on a call and all the other attendees are from the client’s side. Many times, I’ve been dragged or had to drag a teammate into an impromptu call just so there’s a familiar face on the call. That’s a good spotter.

Someone who can break large tasks into manageable bits and someone who can show up to give you some extra confidence.

You need that spotter.

A Spotter to Give a Slight Nudge When You’ve Stalled

The exclamation, “one more!” is often followed by a slight nudge to the bar you’re lifting. I always thought when that is done, the spotter has lifted the bar but I’ve been a spotter for some people and I find that when I do that, I’m not actually lifting, they’re still the ones pushing it.

Sometimes, a slight touch on the bar is all it takes to help you push through a stalled rep. A spotter’s small assistance can be the difference between failing and completing the lift.

Deadline day… You’ve hit writer’s block and this proposal deck is still not ready. You put a call through to a teammate who comes in and in a few minutes the last pieces of the puzzle are put together and we’re good to go. That extra set of eyes was all it took to get you past the limitation.

You can’t always do it alone.

You need that spotter.

A Spotter to Receive the Weight When You Can’t Do Anymore

Okay, let’s be real. Sometimes, you just can not.

You’ve listened to one too many motivational speakers telling you to push beyond your comfort zone and now you’re attempting to bench more than you should. 2 reps in and your hands are giving up. No amount of shouting “one more!” can help and now you’re genuinely done. You’ve hit failure. Anything more, you would injure yourself.

Your spotter needs to receive the bar from you.

In the office, having a support system means knowing that when you’re overwhelmed, someone can step in to help. “Share the deck with me and I’ll give it a look”, is sometimes the exact sentence you want to hear when you’re approaching a deadline.

A Spotter to Tell You “You Did Great.”

“You is a what?… You is a beast!”. I mean it wasn’t the most confident set, I struggled throughout but hearing those words from this spotter was a bit flattering. It made me smile a bit because “Why this guy dey whine me?” but at the same time, “Lol, thanks man… “.

EOY, time to go on holidays but the managers gather us for a final session and hand us personalized notes of gratitude and recognition, and that made my whole year.

After a tough session, it’s encouraging when your spotter acknowledges your effort and tells you that you did well. That small recognition goes a long way. At work, positive reinforcement is just as important. Whether it’s a simple “Great job!” after a presentation or recognition for hard work, validation fuels motivation and builds confidence.

You need that spotter

Conclusion: Success and Growth is a Team Effort

Choose a great gym, choose a great work place.

Get a good spotter (or spotters), be a good spotter.

PS: This isn’t just about the gym and the office. This is about life. Don’t go through life alone. Have friends, have confidants, have God. Have a spotter. ❤️& 💡